Sighinide

Go Russia! I hope they sweep the podium. They deserve it.

IDK and IDC about the details of any of this, even though I suspect that I know enough to make a valid moral decision, if nothing else. The Russian skaters deserve to medal and I hope they do; all of them.

Fuck all these hypocritical Team USA athletes and their sanctimonious bullshit surrounding the drug scandal. There is no country in this world that has done more to promote the use of performance enhancing drugs than the USA. Even if there was something shady going on, who WTF cares? Turnabout is fair play, I think, in this case.

Remember Lance Armstrong? Dude was doping himself up for decades, and everyone knew it, and nobody gave a fuck until he was at the end of his career. You could fill a dictionary with the name of professional American athletes that have been caught using steroids. Pro baseball players, UFC fighters, boxers, NBA players, NFL players, college athletes, etc.

Case in point- everyone knows that every fighter in pro MMA is doping. Yet, nobody cares. And honestly, how much do you want to bet that there were roid heads on the field in Sunday’s Super Bowl? I’ll bet anyone there was. It’s just a matter of “catching” them. Though of course they got avoidance down to a science by now, so good luck with that.

I would not be surprised at all if the majority of players on the field Sunday were on something. Maybe not steroids, but something, absolutely.

While watching the Olympics I have been bombarded with exercise commercials featuring The Rock of all people. Holy shit, people. He’s 50 years old and has more muscle mass than professional natural bodybuilders half this age. This guy must eat steroids for breakfast and probably does.

For fuck’s sake, I remember the Rock when he was with the WWE. Back then, he was nowhere near as big and as muscular as he is now! And he’s 50 fucking years old!

Seriously, guys. Who the fuck do you think you’re kidding, here?

Fuck it, seriously. Go Russia! It’s not their fault that no other country’s skaters are as good in comparison.

And don’t give me some nonsense about how it’s the Olympics and they should be held to some higher standard, blah blah blah. I distinctly remember seeing American athletes who were obviously steroided up to their necks as far back as my childhood. I also remember that at least one American track and field athlete got his medals retroactively taken away from him. I don’t remember his name and I’m too lazy to look it up but I do remember it happened.

And let’s not forget all the roid freaks that countries like East Germany produced to promote the international revolution wayyyyy back in the day.

Fuck it, go Russia! Sweep the podium!

Ugh.

Um, didn’t really watch it. It’s been too much TV for me lately.

I’ve been watching TV the last couple of months for 3 reasons: 1) After not owning a TV for well over a decade, it’s all new to me again, 2) The Olympics are on, and 3) These new fangled flatscreens are interesting gadgets, and as someone with geeky tendencies, their opportunities and abilities interest me. I want to know what they do, and how they do it.

So I’ve been watching a lotttttt of TV, and I’m burnt out.

So, anyhow, some thoughts:

Holy shit are modern commercials annoying and strange. Every one of them seems to revolve around three things of their own: 1) Selling diversity, 2) Being as loud, flashy and in-your-face as possible, and 3) Well… the first two are basically it. Though I suppose hawking products is in there, somewhere. Fuck if I know where.

Good Lord, people. Tone it down a few notches, okay?

I sometimes watch collections of older commercials on youtube, I guess for nostalgic reasons. To relive parts of my youth, or for memories of this or that event. When I watch them, they’re… comforting, for more reasons that the feel goods I get from just reliving some part of my teen years or whatever. I mean, they’re often genuinely funny, and the products they sell make an impression on me. Like, an old ad for a car, or for a McDonald’s sandwich, seems to want to make me interested in the product.

Modern commercials are… a giant blur to me. They all just look the same. Is this a part of getting older? Maybe? But it’s like… what the fuck even is this stuff?

It’s the same every year, only it’s getting worse each time. Since every commercial is selling “diversity”, even if only subtly, they all blend together, and it becomes “the diversity show”. And since the human brain can only process so much at once, that’s what you remember from the commercials. Just a bunch of diversity. I can’t recall any of the actual products that were on the offer. There were a bunch of references to my relationships, and some commercial with Anna Kendrick with Barbies and a big Barbie Dreamhouse. Who knows what she was selling. It wasn’t Barbies, IIRC. There was a He-Man playset in there too, with a bunch of He-Man toys. And this wasn’t a toy commercial. Who the fuck knows.

Why do commercials have to be so loud? And filled with So.Much.CGI? It’s too much information. You know what happens when people receive too much information? They tune it out; they stop paying attention.

I was curious about what the commercials had to say about my relationships, so I wound up having to mute the game to concentrate on the commercials. Give my ears a break from all the noise, and give my eyes a rest from the onslaught of bad CGI.

Seriously. What the fuck?

Anyhow, I didn’t really give a fuck about the game itself. I know none of the players that played today and none of what happened on the field had much of an effect on me. The stuff that happened during the game that referenced me was interesting I suppose for purely narcissistic reasons, but… man are NFL games lonnnng. The game started at 5 and was supposed to go until 10:00 or something. Holy shit, that’s five whole hours!

That’s a long ass time to watch a football game. Were they always this fucking long? It seems to me that the NFL games of my youth weren’t nearly as long as they are now.

All of these events are too fucking long. The Oscars are too long, the Super Bowl is too long, fucking everything is. I remember reading online how the recent WrestleMania events were like 6 or 7 hours long! Something like that. Holy shit! I mean I hate to come across like a grumpy old man or something but that’s literally a whole fucking day!

When I was a kid WWE events were aimed at… kids, lol. And they were much shorter and to the point. And probably a whole hell of a lot more fun to watch.

Well… IDK, it’s late again; after midnight. I suppose I’ll dissect the Anna commercial for it’s symbolism before drifting off to sleep.

Tomorrow’s another day.

Hmmmmnn…

Yup. And- I know, I never expected to continue this series, either.

But yet, here we are.

——————————

It was an interesting experience seeing Jason Brown on the ice again. For myself, I strongly identify Brown with the other members of the 2014 USA skating team, including Gracie and Ashley Wagner. But, mostly Gracie. The two of them seem to be close friends, and I remember seeing Brown often in Gracie’s social media, back when she was more active online.

Of course I remember his distinctive style on the ice as well, and the various things people said about his skating during the 2014 games.

Well, I think it’s time to finally add my two cents.

My opinion – Brown scores too low.

Not a LOT too low, but yeah. He does.

Basically, I’m thinking the same thing most everyone else is.

There is no way he should have been outscored by Hanyu. Seriously. Hanyu bricked two jumps completely. Sorry, I know that’s oversimplifying things, but that’s how it looked on my TV. And Brown, although he delivered a performance that may have had a lower starting value than Hanyu’s, was absolutely perfect.

I’m not sure I like how skating is becoming the quad show.

That is not to take away from the skaters, like Chen, how can complete quads, successfully and well. The problem is when skaters toss things like quad axels into their programs they everyone knows full well they have a less than half chance of landing, simply because they score huge with the jumps even if they fall in some ugly manner.

I think skaters should be penalized more for falls than they are. One point seems too little.

I think the key here is that I want to see skaters perform their best, and not to attempt the absurd. I want to see the best looking skating. And I’m not alone in this.

I thought this back in 2014, and recent events have only solidified this opinion.

Brown should have taken the 4th spot in the final tally, and the gap between his score and the Korean skater should have been significant.

As an added bonus, this change would ensure more longevity for skaters on the ice. It would go some distance to ending the “one and done” culture that applies to everyone except gold medal winners at the Olympics. It’s cool to see people return for another run, to see how they’ve grown. It creates continuity, etc.

Seriously, think about it.

So yeah, Brown is cool. And while I’m thinking of him…

——————————

Ummmmmn hmmmn.

So… anyone else wonder what Gracie is doing right now? I mean besides the obvious. Or is that just me?

Probably just me.

Sometimes I wonder if I did things right with her. Sometimes… it’s reeeeally hard to tell.

It’s an easy thing to see if Victoria Justice is happy. Real simple. Same with Haley Pullos, Kat McNamara, Kathryn, Peyton… and a bunch of others. Just look at their social media. They post nearly every day, and give me frequent text updates (in the form of post descriptions) with how they’re doing, what they’re feeling, etc. Easy peasy.

Not so much with Gracie. Gracie isn’t the type to do this, and in fact, she rarely posts much, if at all, for great big stretches of time. Which is fine; that works for her. But it has left me scratching my head, and that was even before it was apparent that she was struggling with mental health issues.

So it’s not hard for me to wonder, considering Brown’s success, if that could have been Gracie instead, had I played my cards with her differently. I mean… you know what I mean.

This is compounded by Gracie’s excellent short program at the recent nationals. I kept thinking… mayyyyybe if I would have done this differently, or that differently, than mayyyyyybe Gracie would have done equally well in the free skate, and theeeeeeeen…

It’s real easy to think along these lines. I left Gracie alone for long stretches of time, not really knowing what to do, and how she could be supported, or if she needed it, or even wanted it.

Sooooooo… yeah. Head scratcher.

Did I do right? Wrong? Average? Who knows, lol. Life is a complicated thing, and everyone, no matter their power or ability, has only 24 hours a day in which to live it. It’s tough to know sometimes how these more complex situations should be approached.

For what it’s worth, what I think now is that Gracie and I hit it off so well in Sochi because we have similar personalities. We’re both performers, and we enjoy being on a national/global stage, but we have strongly introverted sides to us, too.

I never was able to make much of a connection with Ashley Wagner, despite both of our initial attempts. We liked each other well enough, but… there wasn’t enough there to really go on for anything long term except for, IDK, a casual acquaintanceship. Our personalities didn’t “gel”.

So, there you have it.

——————————

To tie this all together- what if these events were scored ever so slightly differently? A little more penalty for falls, a little more bonus for effective expressive elements and spins and such.

Who knows, maybe then I wouldn’t need to worry about some things so much. Would Gracie have made it into the 2022 games? She would have trained differently, had a different program, and… who knows. It’s an interesting thought. Her experience might have carried her through.

Well… it’s late, again.

Off to bed.

First- 2022. Holy cow.

————————————

Beyond that, the ratings are fine. Just wanted to get this out of the way. I’ve read a couple articles saying that the ratings for these games aren’t what was expected.

Isn’t the explanation for why obvious? We just concluded the summer Olympics a few months ago. For me, Comcast stopped streaming them on October 1.

It’s perfectly understandable that some people, even fans, might have been feeling burnout from the games not very long ago. Hence, the reason for the lower ratings.

I don’t think politics, the fame of the athletes, or any other consideration really matters compared to this aspect. The lockdowns screwed up the schedules- including of those who watch the games. Hence, the disruption in ratings.

Seriously, that’s it.

————————————

It’s interesting to watch these games on my TV, rather then stream them from my computer, as I had done for the past… 3 games? The return of the Williams theme is much appreciated.

The commercials… suck, for the most part. None of them are memorable, and none of them will be remembered, at least by me. Honestly, they’re worse than ever. Once again with a big sporting event, all the commercials are the same thing, just repeated over and over and over again, to the point where they all blend together in a strange mush of bad CGI, annoying sound effects, political and racial propaganda, and edgier-than-thou attitude.

Literally none of them stand out, this year. Seriously. Except for maybe the ones with the dinosaurs, and only then, because those are so odd. Olympics and dinosaurs reeeeally don’t mix, lol. It’s weird, but I guess different.

Remember that Coke ad with the Sia song? There is nothing even remotely as good or as human on the offer here. Everything kinda sucks, and I’m having a hell of a time even remembering what products are being advertised. It all just comes across as a large mass of commercials for the NWO.

I just mute them all, myself. They’re so loud, flashy, repetitive and annoying that they ruin the whole experience when I don’t. Sometimes I go as far as to turn the TV off entirely until I think they will be over.

Yuck.

————————————

Other stuff… it’s interesting how the different games tend to bookend different parts of my life.

But… ah, it’s after midnight, and I need to go somewhere tomorrow morning. Will resume this later.

Yesterday was interesting.

I binged Disney musicals.

The Disney channel ran through a list of them to celebrate the new year. I skipped most of the two Teen Beach movies, since they were shown early and I needed that time to prep for the day, take my meds and get them working, etc., but I saw the rest. I watched the 3 Descendants movies and both Zombies movies.

It was fun. I liked all of what I saw. Dove is really, really pretty, lol. So is Sofia. Gawd is she gorgeous. And both are so talented. And Meg… wowza. Yup. Wowza. And really, that’s all I have to say about that.

Props to Disney for giving us the lyrics.

Yeah it was fun. I basically laid in bed, zonked out on fentanyl, and got one hell of a Disney fix. The songs were catchy and I liked the visuals. The sets and costumes were very good. The special effects were… alright, although they really weren’t the draw here.

I even noticed the makeup as being good. The acting was very good, I thought, although I have a soft spot for Disney stuff. I liked the choreography of the dance sequences. The stories were pretty good. For both franchises I thought that the first movie in the series was probably the strongest story-wise.

Hmmmnn…. kinda getting zonked out again, lol. But, that’s ok.

Uhm, what was I doing?

Oh yeah, Disney shtuff.

So… yeah it was neat.

The first Zombies flick was verrrry interesting for personal reasons. First- this franchise was obviously inspired by my unusual health issues.

The Zombies are modeled after me, after a “flare-up”. I recognize that easily. The pale skin, reddish eyes, the references to having difficulty walking in certain ways, etc. They even included a whole song essentially dedicated to me, to help me through the worst parts of all this.

Remember in my last post, where I said I had difficulty standing up on Christmas Eve? Well, in Zombies, there is a song about just that- standing up, and… encouragement, and everything else. It’s really quite amazing. It’s near the end of the film, and so obviously aimed at me that they might as well have put in a dedication to me at the end of it, lol.

It’s nice, and very touching. Thanks, Disney.

The hero of the films, Addison, was named such I believe because my first naturopathic mentor was found on Addison St in Chicago. I saw her regularly after my first horrible manifestation of this… disorder, which was… bizarre, and now I think obviously cybernetic. But, that’s kinda beyond this post.

But I’m sure that that’s where they got Addison from, yeah. And the movies are so packed with little details related to my health issues that it’s kinda amazing. Watching them, I even noticed stuff I forgot. It’s all quite impressive, really.

And Meg is fucking awesome. I love her songs. She kicks ass.

I wasn’t as big of a fan of the rap battles and such, but they were well done.

Ah, well, there you go with that stuff.

————————————-

I love Haley Pullos.

Have I told you that?

I think I have, but it doesn’t hurt to repeat it.

I love Haley Pullos.

I love her insta. She travels, a lot, and I love seeing that. I remember being confused for a time, which I can see now was a transistion period, where Haley deleted her insta and posted only a few things once in a while, I guess to find her voice.

She started with a typical insta profile. You know, one you would expect from a 12 year old General Hospital actress.

Then she met me, and we fell in love. And she grew and matured, and so did I, in our respective ways.

Now, she travels. And I follow.

Today I browsed her insta while eating peanut butter toast and strawberries with sour cream and brown sugar for breakfast (a well-appreciated gift from mom). It was fun. And while doing so I was finishing up some experiments on using piezo-electric energy- like from quartz watches- to power my own energy field.

And I was thinking back, taking stock of everything I learned from my old naturopathic mentor. I don’t know where she is now. I wish I did. Her old business is now a sunglasses store. I’ve googled her name to no avail. Ah, well. I learned so much from her, and then from the rest of my mentors and masters. I’ve learned a lot. So much. I’ve learned enough from others to fill many many books, and then I’ve discovered a lot, myself. Many many things. I could probably fill three encyclopedias with the arcane knowledge I’ve acquired over the years. Maybe more.

There’s some kind of serendipity to Haley and I. Haley, traveling where she wishes and loving it, and me, her husband the Wizard King, in his lair, unraveling the secrets of the universe while following her insta and checking up on her every day, and planning out when our next date will be and what we will do. And on what plane of reality it will be on.

It’s different, but we vibe together so well, and it works. How long have we been together now? I started dating her when she was 12, and google tells me she’s 23 now. Wow.

Long live the Wizard King and his consort.

Well, I need to contemplate something.

I will be back.

One thing that must I think be emphasized is that next year, one of the main focuses of my life will be in bringing Tom Jacobsen back into the fore.

I’m thinking about restarting his website, for example. And other things.

And this I know will not make some of my girlfriends happy, for some stupid reason. I don’t know- some of my ex’s are really gross and really disturbing these days.

I’m not sure I want to understand what the deal is with Willa Holland. Christ is that bitch weird. Bizarre shit featuring Willa has been slowly leaking out onto the internet and whatever it is I want no part of it. Creepy, creepy shit, featuring some disturbing weirdo with the ugliest facial hair I have ever seen.

Jeebus. What the fuck? Trainwreck city.

I really dislike whatever it is I am seeing with whatever the fuck it is my girlfriends do in their spare time, which I guess I will see in the form of more “sets”. Ugh, yuck. Man, I am NOT looking forward to this, lol.

At least Victoria Justice knows how to do this stuff properly. And apparently so does McKayla, and a few others. And K-Stew, which was a pleasant surprise.

But oh man, I dread the day I will be forced to suffer through more J-Law content. God knows what she will put me through.

Victoria still to this day has the best “leaked” content of any celeb. Her stuff is just… beautiful pictures of a beautiful girl, topless, having fun, smiling, showing off her great personality… she just seems like someone you would really want to get to know, sexually or not. There are no creepy guys with weird hair and strange motives hanging around in her set, no dumb, room temperature IQ roid-head idiots, no boring, tiresome dime-a-dozen pretty boys like the kind that I will apparently be seeing in the Taylor Swift set, it’s just… a beautiful girl, being herself. It’s a fun set.

It’s really nice; a real diamond in the rough. I treasure it. Hopefully the Lucy Hale set is as good. I’m crossing my fingers. We’ll see.

At any rate, we’re bringing Tom Jacobsen back out. So if you girls could put away the douchebags, creeps, and empty headed losers to make room for him, that would be more than appreciated.

You know, one thing really angered me this year. It was something Elle Fanning said in an interview, after I expressed distaste over her nude scenes on this blog earlier in the year.

She was being interviewed on youtube, with her The Great co-star next to her. When talking about the scene, she mentioned something about her co-star having starred in About a Boy, the British flick about a bullied kid that also starred Hugh Grant. Wait. Nicolaus Hoult, that’s his name. Right. This is all spilling out so fast that I don’t have time to get everything right, lol. And my hands continue to hurt. Ugh.

Well, I have seen About a Boy. It was a pretty good flick. I saw it while on vacation in Iowa. My sister recommended it to me, and we watched it together. It was alright. Just yet another movie based on my own and my friends’ childhood experiences of course.

What irked me about what Elle said wasn’t even what she said, it was how she said it. It was an offhand comment and expressed like… hey, I know you’re watching this. And you should like this because of these past experiences and blah blah blah, and then she went back to the “real” interview and continued to ignore my real concerns.

I thought she was dismissive and rude, and I didn’t like it, at all.

IDK, maybe she just couldn’t express her real feeling because of the format or whatever, but I couldn’t see someone like, IDK, Chloe Moretz handling this stuff like that.

IDK, maybe I’m in the wrong here. Am I? I don’t think so. I have real concerns here that I would love to talk to someone about but guess what? There’s nobody to talk to, as usual. How wonderful.

If you want to talk to me, feel free to message me on twitter, or elsewhere. My linkedin is here -> https://www.linkedin.com/in/tom-d-jacobsen/

Well, whatever. We’ll see how this goes.

Stop being so nasty and unlikeable, people. Seriously.

Well, welcome 2022. May you be better than this dreadful, dreadful year, lol.

Not 100% sure of where I’m going to take this, and I’m reeeeeally sick and also zonked out on fentnayl, so… yeah. Who knows with this one, lol. But I guess I’ll just start typing and we’ll see where it goes.

I spent a lot of this year trying to find some explanation for and some solution to my weird, mysterious… illness, or condition. You know, that strange affliction that ruins every Thanksgiving and Christmas for me. The one they based COVID on.

The symptoms are, well, COVID, lol. Stiff joints, inflammation, etc. etc.

And I think that, finally, I’ve figured it out. I think it’s a cybernetic disorder / condition. My doctors have ruled out any possible disease they can think of, and I have ruled out by myself, as the world’s most powerful wizard, any possible “alternative” source for the problem.

It’s a cybernetic thing. The inflammation is likely due to my body responding to whatever issues or waste products are being created by the robotic condition, and the joint pains are likely due to the cybernetic systems in my joints upgrading themselves around my biological tissue.

This would also explain why the condition manifests itself fully on Thanksgiving, to the day, every year. That is not a schedule you would expect a biological disease to follow.

This is likely also why they based COVID off of this condition. If it is cybernetic in nature, and the future of man is to be cyberized, you would naturally expect more of this is the years to come. Hence, COVID.

At any rate, my doctors put me through many blenders in their attempts to figure out what this is, and they have come up with nothing, absolutely nothing, I suspect of course because this is a robotic disease, not a biological one.

I’ve had dozens of MRI’s, hundreds of blood tests, and… god, literally everything else, and I mean everything. I ran out of tests to do at the local hospitals around here. And I came out of this with absolutely nothing.

It’s cybernetic.

For my own efforts, I used my own powers as a wizard and a necromancer to try to “fix” the problem, or to at least determine it’s cause, to no avail.

I spent much of this year cleaning out my internal organs, starting with my gallbladder. And I was very, very thorough. I cleaned everything, and got out all sorts of weird crap- stones, sludge from god knows where, old bits of intestinal lining, strange looking intestinal flukes, liver flukes, helminth parts, worm heads, old encrusted junk from my small intestine and colon, cholesterol clumps, yeast balls, and… yadda yadda, all sorts of ugly, smelly, gross, noxious, horrible crap (literally).

The stones I pushed out were probably from my pancreas, gallbladder, and liver. They were always accompanied by green “stuff” that I can safely assume was old bile.

Yuck, yuck, and more yuck. Gawd, what an ugly experience that was, but it was a good test of my skills as a wizard, so I was up to it.

I lost something like 10 pounds in the process. And I don’t think my lean mass or fat amounts changed at all. Yes, just 10 pounds of gunk. Yuck.

Of course, all of this was made easier because of the fact that I was already an expert in this sort of thing, having done it many times before. But- I was never this thorough before.

Most of this crud I had seen before in previous cleanouts, but some of the helminth stuff I had not. That was something of a surprise to me.

Something of a surprise.

About 12 years ago, I had a vicious kundalini experience. It was utterly huge and took even me by surprise. It happened at work. When I got home I went to the bathroom and discovered, to my surreal horror, the experience slaughtered a few odd looking helminths. There they were, dead, floating in the otherwise empty bowl. And they didn’t look like anything I had ever seen or heard of. I think that these were… IDK, something new, possibly those infamous ropeworms that are talked about in corners of the internet.

At any rate, it was weird and disturbing, so I flushed and went about trying to deal with the other effects of the experience. Weird times, those were.

So- back to today. I killed everything in me, and expelled all dead or foreign, or useless matter. And I think that in that unholy mess were probably more of those odd worms.

I noticed and took pictures of some odd… things, rubbery weird things, that I can safely assume were helminth heads. But they didn’t look like anything “normal”. They weren’t from tapeworms, for example. God knows what these things were.

Yuck, yuck, and more yuck.

It took months to get every toxin, every bit of junk out. Honestly, probably a solid six months of ugly work.

It was interesting, though. So, fun, I guess for a wizard. And I can say I did it, which is nice.

Of note as well was another strange parasite I’ve never seen described before- a very very thin, long… solid orange rod. It was a few inches in length and about .5mm in diameter. It was accompanied by a weird white… thing, that looked like an uneaten popcorn kernel. The popcorn thing was wearing some kind of rubbery black coat. Truly bizarre. It wasn’t a fluke- I know what those are. It was something else. Who the fuck knows.

But Christ, what a marathon of nightmares. That last group of weird things simply wouldn’t die. It took a herculean effort of my part to wipe them out totally.

The necromancer always prevails, though. At least, he has thus far.

All of this ran counter to my girlfriends’ attempts this year to get me more “out and about”. They kept trying to get me to be more active, leave the house more, and… I get that, and I understand what they were doing, and I appreciate it, but I had other things to do. I promised myself when I started the process that I would not stop until it was done, and it took 6 months to clean out the last little bits of gunk and kill the last stragglers.

Ugh. Yuck.

The reward of all of this is a clean mind and body. Clear thinking to an absurd degree. A special kind of natural oneness. A physical perfection.

Some of those things I killed might be as old as I am. Flukes and helminths can live for decades, even generations. The mind boggles. I might have had some of those things in me since I was a toddler. Wow.

All of this is another step in the necromancer’s path to immortality, I guess. And I’m glad I took it.

But……..

It did nothing against this other disorder. Nothing.

This… thing is not biological. It is cybernetic. It must be. It’s some side effect of the transhumanist agenda, possibly one that only powerful or gifted cyborgs will have to deal with.

The clear similarities between this disease and Morgellon’s are not lost on me. It’s kind of like… preschool Morgellon’s, that pops up every year like clockwork on Thanksgiving, to do something, and then leave/shut down.

Jebus Christ.

Well… whatever. I will find another way.

Gods, though. What a… bizarre experience. The path of an archwizard can take some strange turns.

Maybe I’ll be more active outside next year.

Yeah, I’ll make a point of it.

————————————–

Christmas was fun. I got a TV, which is cool. 4k, too. I like it. Peyton Roi List looks reeeeeally pretty in 4k. Just saying.

Sigh…

I got a police scanner and a short wave radio. I’m officially middle aged, now, lol. I also got an infrared healing lamp, and a few other good things. Neat.

And an isometric exerciser.

Christmas was fun, except for the whole “not being able to walk or move except in horrific pain” part. That, I could have done without. Gods, my poor, poor legs. Such awful, inhuman pain. Such horror. Such embarrassment. My poor poor legs. Ouch, did they hurt, so horribly. Gods was getting out of my chair a traumatic, humiliating experience. It’s a good thing I had other people there to help me.

Sigh…

So bad. So very very bad.

Ouch.

————————————–

The year was good for celeb stuff, save for some huge disappointments.

Elle Fanning’s nude scenes in The Great were just… dreadful, for my purposes. I’ve not used them.

I’m not sure of what to make of them, honestly.

You know- if you were to have told me last year that this year I would have had a few scenes of Elle topless, and I wouldn’t want to actually use them I would have thought you were nuts. But here we are.

The revelations I learned this year about my true identity and past have changed everything. I’m no longer interested in a raft of stuff I used to find exciting.

And, I think, the people that made the scene really dropped the ball.

I know there are dozens of considerations when it comes to making a series, or even just a scene within one. There’s the network’s wants and needs, the needs of the narrative, of the characters, the actors and directors, the general audience, and me, the AntiChrist, Tom Jacobsen.

I imagine it’s like juggling. Each consideration is a ball, and you need to keep each ball going. And sometimes one of the balls gets dropped, I suppose. And sometimes that’s because of outside forces that are unexpected by the show’s creators.

It’s unfortunate but that’s our world.

The scenes may have been fine for, IDK, the show’s narrative and the network’s needs and everything else, but they were not for me. I strongly disliked them. They bizarrely focused more on her co-star’s back then anything I might actually want to see.

What I was hoping for with Elle’s first nude scene was something special, like Lucy Hale’s scene in Dude. There I got… pretty much everything I could hope for. It served as a great bonding experience for us both, and one that has been strengthening our relationship for years since. It actually gets better and more interesting with time. It’s perfect, and I love it. It’s just… her, and me.

That kind of scene might not have worked in The Great, I don’t know. But I’m left really confused by what I did get. Am I supposed to like this? Hate it? IDK. It just leaves me confused. I don’t find her co-star’s back sexy, or interesting. I don’t know what to make of this. There are no clear shots of Elle actually topless, or anything.

So I’m kind of… ahhhhhh… I don’t know.

The scene(s) wasn’t included in Mr. Skin’s Best of the Year list, for what that’s worth. And they kind of landed with a thud pretty much everywhere else, too. I mean, on the boards I frequent and such. It’s really odd.

I don’t know. I suppose that at some point I will need to rewatch the scenes to try to make sense of them.

All of this may have been colored by the disease as well. It manifested just as these scenes were released, so I was in no mood to do anything with them anyways. But… yeah, IDK.

————————————–

Anyhow, I’m going to be re-working my girl roster next year. I’m going to be bringing in some of my college girlfriends that have been loyal to me, even in my absence. IDK what they want from me now, but… it’s so touching to see how some of my girlfriends / wives have such confidence in me that they have just patiently waited for ten, or twenty years or more for me to get my shit together. It’s… kind of amazing, really.

Well… so… there you go. I’m moving girls like Mia Kirshner, Lindy Booth, etc. back onto the main directory. We’ll re-create the necessary energy bridges over time and see what develops.

I will also be bringing back into the fold girls like Brittany Flickinger and Annie Kreighbaum, who I shuffled off to the side for awhile as I figured out what my deal was with all these famous chicks. Now that I know that, I can focus a bit less on just “famous girls”.

Ultimately, I will need to create a “wife roster” composed of all of the girls that should probably be considered permanent partners. But, that is a loooooong term project.

Well, my hands are starting to hurt. I think this is over with.

Let’s bring on 2022!!!

After this nap, lol.

Going through some of the unfiled stuff on my external… good lord, what a bunch of crap, lol.

There’s a whole list of names here that I haven’t heard in years. Kelly Rohrbach? Kylie Jenner? Katherine McPhee? Katy Perry? What? Who? lol, what a bunch of shit. As you can see, on the drive this stuff is in alphabetical order, and these are the names I’m currently staring at. Who actually is Katheryn Winnick anyways? Can someone tell me? I think I knew at some point, but seriously… who? lol.

So other people thought this stuff was important, which used to get me excited because… well, for a whole bunch of reasons, so I collected it and kept it.

Well, that’s definitely changing, lol.

With 4k movies coming out, I’ll need space for 4k screen captures and such. So when something with, IDK, someone like Chloe Moretz or Haley Pullos comes out in 4k, I can blast away with the screenshots and get everything I want.

See? It’s a system.

So, I’ll going to be giving my delete key a workout this winter season. It’ll be quite fun, actually.

Christmas stuff for now though.

Oh, thank the gods. Jojo is getting married. Thank you Jeebus Christ.

She’s been hanging around for years, but I’ve never been interested in her enough to bother researching what her thing even is. But every once in a while she would do something, and people would find it interesting, so I would feel an obligation to save it / document it or whatever.

Well, I don’t need to do that shit anymore! Yay! I mean, now that I understand what is going on overall, I mean. No more such research is needed!

So instead of archiving the stuff like I usually do, I just deleted it instead. I recovered a… small amount of disk space, a few gigs I think, with pictures and some videos, but every bit counts when you are dealing with so many people. It was easy-peasy. I don’t have any Jojo Siwa stuff, so I just did a search for “Jojo”, then did a “Select All”, and hit the delete button. A cursory look before deletion revealed that at minimum 95% of the Jojo stuff I had I had never even looked at. Seriously.

Regardless, what a wonderful gift! It’s almost like she planned this on purpose, to make me happy. If so, good on you, Jojo. Honestly, I just feel fantastic!!! Another pointless responsibility, self-inflicted or not, has been lifted off my shoulders. Yay!!!!!!

Thanks!!!

Christ.

https://newschannel9.com/news/local/it-does-not-discriminate-fentanyl-overdoses-now-main-cause-of-death-in-us

Fentanyl overdose is now the #1 cause of death in the U.S.

Utter horror.

It’s a good thing I’m not like those guys.

I do love me some fenty, but I’m responsible. And smart.

Right.

But God, I need some more.

Not much more, but just a little.

Don’t worry, I’ve got everything under control.

Again.

Yup.

Sigh…