One more depressing note today, for those interested.<\/p>\n
I’m still ambivalent at best with all of these celeb leaks and such. TBH, most of this stuff is more of a turn-off than a turn-on, and if any of this is an attempt to appeal to me (I know, fat chance), than it’s kind of unfortunate that people still don’t get me very well, even after all these years.<\/p>\n
My real interest vis-a-vis Hollywood was to create and form lasting relationships with people that I thought could bear fruit and grow and flower and such. To that end, I am somewhat attracted to film scenes and on-screen nudity and things like this.<\/p>\n
I am not attracted to domestic sexual stuff and things like that at all. That isn’t who I am. To credit others, I myself wasn’t too sure of that a long time ago, but now that I know myself better, I can say that unequivocally.<\/p>\n
Most of the stuff in these leaks is more likely to push me away than make me attracted to anyone.<\/p>\n
A few weeks ago, I drafted this:<\/p>\n
——————————————————————<\/p>\n
Well, the latest Fappening came and went. As of tonight, I’m pretty sure it’s over.<\/p>\n
My take?<\/p>\n
It was fun and interesting. I learned a lot, and had a great deal of fun leaking pictures to the public, and filling in gaps in my own collection.<\/p>\n
I also learned a bit about me, and love, and life in general.<\/p>\n
I learned what I<\/i> like, finally, at this stage of life. I like commitment and consistency. Right now, I like stable, long lasting relationships with people I trust and can connect with over casual sex and flings. <\/p>\n
I saw a lot of pics and clips over the last few months that were objectively “hot”, but used very, very few of them. Not because the pictures were bad, but because I had no interest. The Emma Watson pics, yes, I used. But the rest of them, no. In fact I think Watson might have been the only<\/i> set I actually used this time. <\/p>\n
Love, I learned, makes sex work best.<\/p>\n
The Katie Cassidy pics I liked quite a bit, and they were almost used a couple of times, but… I was always drawn back to someone I was actually in love with. I just couldn’t take my eyes off of Bridget Mendler the night I determined that I should<\/i> use the Cassidy pics. Because I would rather spend 5 minutes with Bridgit watching the grass in my backyard than 5 days with Cassidy having her fulfill my every fantasy. Because I love Bridgit- I truly do. Cassidy, I might like if I was to get to know her. But Bridgit? I’ve known her now for who knows how many years, and she gets more beautiful every time I see her.<\/p>\n
And considering that I can just go ahead and have Mendler fulfill my every sexual dream, well, that’s that.<\/p>\n
And of course Tay was important. She always is. <\/p>\n
——————————————————————<\/p>\n
How naive I was, lol. I should have been much harsher.<\/p>\n
This little hobby of mine is clearly not making me happy, anymore. There is too much stuff floating around, so much that even collecting all of it is a nightmare. <\/p>\n
I need to scale back, if I am to continue with this stuff in any capacity and still retain my sanity.<\/p>\n
And with this Trump nonsense…. I don’t really want<\/i> to be associated with this establishment, anymore. That is a bridge too far. <\/p>\n
Truthfully, I want to leave.<\/p>\n
I have learned almost everything that I need to learn about magic and society and myself and everything else through this little hobby of mine, and I think that there’s just nothing more to earn with celebs, anymore. The well has gone dry, and every significant treasure and insight has been unearthed. <\/p>\n
And, TBH, I don’t like the implications of the leaks, either. <\/p>\n
I’m not, despite what many seem to think, solely a sexual being. I have other concerns, and would like fulfillment in other ways besides just having pictures to look at. <\/p>\n
So- I would like to keep few girls that I think I can trust, but would not like to be hit on by God knows how many hundreds of others, from now on.<\/p>\n
I mean, it’s a free country, so you can do what you want, but still… I’m just saying that it’s too much. <\/p>\n
I’m still enforcing that rule of marriage, or kids= relationship over w\/ me, just to simplify things. (Edit- I’m extending the cutoff to engagements, too. Just fyi.)<\/p>\n
IDC, to be honest. And I’m sure that they don’t either, so, that’s that.<\/p>\n
Real life is waiting for me, in whatever way I choose to live it.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
One more depressing note today, for those interested. I’m still ambivalent at best with all of these celeb leaks and such. TBH, most of this stuff is more of a turn-off than a turn-on, and if any of this is an attempt to appeal to me (I know, fat chance), than it’s kind of unfortunate […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2363"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2363"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2363\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2371,"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2363\/revisions\/2371"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2363"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2363"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2363"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}