is by far the greatest woman on Earth.<\/p>\n
She is the pinnacle of everything a hot chick should be. <\/p>\n
This morning was epic. It was incredible. Here\u2019s what happened: First, I woke up a year older. Today\u2019s my birthday! Epic! And when I woke up, I got a hunch that I *might* want to google Taylor Swift. Maybe her video leaked early! But I didn\u2019t. Something told me it would work out better if I didn\u2019t.<\/p>\n
See, the video *DID* leak early. And it\u2019s just awesome that it did!!!! See, maybe this video is a birthday present, and Tay wanted me to see it early! But I\u2019m glad I didn\u2019t see it before work, though. I saw it AT work, with the sound off, as soon as I got in. <\/p>\n
It\u2019s INCREDIBLE. WOW WOW WOW WOW Taylor is hot. Hottest girl in the WORLD by far. I mean, there is no competition in her class!! None at all!!! She\u2019s perfect. That\u2019s all there is to it.<\/p>\n
So now because I didn\u2019t fuck her this morning, I\u2019m going to be thinking about Tay alllll day long at work, which is going to be awesome. I can\u2019t WAIT to see her video with the sound on tonight. It\u2019s going to be the greatest birthday present I\u2019ve ever received. I just can\u2019t WAIT for it. Tay is perfect. So perfect! It\u2019s like she planned all of this out for me!<\/p>\n
And then- an omen. An OMEN. I swear to God! Immediately after I saw the video, I went downstairs into the cafeteria to get some breakfast and I saw a Valentine\u2019s Day cookie. A cookie that looked like TAYLOR!!!!<\/p>\n
I\u2019m not even kidding. It had a blushing girl\u2019s face on it, with bright red lipstick in a heart shape, big expressive eyes, and it even looks like she’s wearing lots of makeup. I couldn\u2019t believe it! The cookie is an omen. A sign. I bought the cookie as soon as I saw it.<\/p>\n
All day today, I\u2019m going to be munching on this wonderfully tasty cookie and dreaming of Taylor. It\u2019s going to be the greatest birthday ever. My favorite<\/i> birthday. See, it\u2019s Friday the 13th- like any witch, I\u2019ve always liked Friday the 13th, and it\u2019s the 13th of the month. That\u2019s important because Taylor and I both have a lucky number in 13. It\u2019s just one of the magical things we share.<\/p>\n
This is going to be awesome. I\u2019m technically \u201cmiddle aged\u201d now. If this is what it\u2019s like to be \u201cmiddle aged\u201d then thank God I\u2019m old! This is amazing!<\/p>\n
—————————————————————————<\/p>\n
I wrote this blog post today at 10:00 a.m.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
is by far the greatest woman on Earth. She is the pinnacle of everything a hot chick should be. This morning was epic. It was incredible. Here\u2019s what happened: First, I woke up a year older. Today\u2019s my birthday! Epic! And when I woke up, I got a hunch that I *might* want to google […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1161"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1161"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1161\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1177,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1161\/revisions\/1177"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1161"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1161"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1161"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}