All these thoughts of cutting brings me back to junior high school. I remember coming home after school, innocent of the wider world but still so lost and troubled. I would regularly cut myself in the bathroom as soon as I got home, before my parents came home from work. By the time they got home, the bleeding had stopped and the sink was clean, and I would be sitting at my old 486, playing Castle of the Winds while listening to Garbage\u2019s first album.<\/p>\n
Ah, the nineties. <\/p>\n
Unlike a couple of my friends, nobody ever called me out as a cutter because I was \u201csmart\u201d. My cutting style was to make numerous smallish cuts instead of a single large one, so as not to leave noticeable scars, and I almost always cut myself in places where nobody would think to look for evidence- say, on the palms of my hands. You can\u2019t easily distinguish between a matrix of scars there and common wrinkles. It was easy to lie about the band aids when I needed them. I could just say that I cut myself sparring, or that I slammed my finger into a door.<\/p>\n
The cuts did, though, get in the way of me playing the guitar. I never did get that Smashing Pumpkins song right.<\/p>\n
\/ Nineties Angst<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
All these thoughts of cutting brings me back to junior high school. I remember coming home after school, innocent of the wider world but still so lost and troubled. I would regularly cut myself in the bathroom as soon as I got home, before my parents came home from work. By the time they got […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/416"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=416"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/416\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":422,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/416\/revisions\/422"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=416"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=416"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sighinide.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=416"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}