Archive for September, 2023

A Few Thoughts on the Maranos’ Saving Zoë

Thursday, September 14th, 2023

To prep for the release of Laura Marano’s debut album and as a follow up to the previous post on this blog, I decided to watch, on Tubi, the Maranos’ (sisters Laura and Vanessa, and mom Ellen) movie Saving Zoë.

Well…

*Ahem* Ok. Wow. Um… This… is going to take some unpacking. Wuh. Wow. Yeah. Multiple posts, this time, for sure. Uhm, yup. Multiple posts.

*Ahem*

Hugely, huuuuuuuuugely personal movie. This one goes way above and beyond the norm in that aspect for sure. Christ, I’m not even sure of what I just saw, honestly. In some instances the movie seems to verge on the autobiographical. Some of the things said and implied by, uh, Echo (Laura), and Zoë (Vanessa) were kind of seriously blunt and shockingly on the nose. One line said by Echo/Laura to her sister Zoë/Vanessa that directly revealed a lot of regret about the sacrifices made to become famous was kinda… interesting. Also interesting that the protagonist Echo/Laura Marano made a snide, direct reference to Laura Marano’s Boombox music video when she talked to her therapist in the movie, who is played by Ken Jeong, who also co-starred with Laura in her Boombox video.

Seriously. I was like… Wut? Did I just hear her say what I thought she said? I actually had to rewind the movie a bit and yeah, Holy Shit, lol. In this instance she didn’t so much break the fourth wall as she sledgehammered it into oblivion, lol.

Obviously there are shedloads of issues at play here concerning me. I take it it’s not a coincidence that the major antagonist is a creepy webmaster who runs an underground website who sexually lusts after both sisters and is named “Tom”. And there’s the whole subplot of narcotics addiction, and… other stuff…

Yeah, we are talking maaaaaajor psychological issues being worked out, here. And I mean… I get it, I do, it’s just… yo. Wow. Holeeee fuck.

Well, just glancing at the IMDB page for this flick, it seems as if this is yet another in a long long line of movies/shows that I’ve talked about here that is underrated. I’m not sure if people really “get” what this movie is saying, and why, and to whom. I’m not… going to bother looking up the RT reviews. Do I need to, really?

I’m still not sure 100% that I understand it, myself. This might in fact take multiple viewings, and that’s a good sign.

Honestly, I’m not sure of how to make this “not complicated”. I was going to start by describing the movie in general, but the closest flick I could think of to this one was… Zoey (!!!!!) Deutch’s Before I Fall. Yes, the same Zoey Deutch that famously guest-starred in an episode of Vanessa Marano’s Switched at Birth, and who was also a Disney regular like Laura. Not Zoë, Zoey. But, back to Zoë.

Actually, no- let’s stay on Zoey for a moment, since I swear I got déjà vu at least 5 times while watching Saving Zoë, and each time, it was in reference to a Zoey Deutch movie, like the aforementioned Before I Fall.

At one point I actually paused Saving Zoë in disbelief because a character recited a line of dialogue verbatim from Zoey’s movie! And in similar circumstances! I mean… were the camera filters the same, too? They kinda looked like it, and… yeah, yikes, lol.

At any rate, in Saving, uh, Zoë, there is a girl, Carly, who, uhm, reminded me a lot, both in looks and part, of Halston Sage’s character in Before I Fall, and… yeah, I don’t know, this only adds to the fuckery.

Ellen Marano (mom) lent her voice to a few episodes of the original Magnum P.I., (including an episode called “Laura”. Wut?!?) and uh… Halston Sage lent her talents to an episode of the remake. Her costar in that episode? Ken Jeong.

Looking up “Laura” in IMDB, we find that it is the second highest rated episode of the show on IMDB and it has a plot that reads like a weird alternate dimension script for Saving Zoë, with the primary change being that of the character of Thomas, who goes from being the good guy (Thomas Magnum) to the bad guy (Tom).

Wut?

I know that Saving Zoë is supposedly based on a book, but… yeah, well. IMDB tells me “The Maranos had the rights for the movie for 10 years. They bought them when they were still very young from Alyson Noel, the author of the novel.” Yeah, I’ll bet.

Oof. Wut?

All of this is seriously making my head spin.

Uhm, I’ll be listening to Laura’s album for sure… and uh, other stuff.

You know- at some point I’ll need to talk about some of the… other other stuff, you know? The really controversial stuff, the stuff I’ve not been talking about for fear of rocking the boat, so to speak. But… not now. IDK.

Honest to God, people. What the… fuck?

The mind just boggles.

Fun Stuff and Other Stuff, Sept 2023

Wednesday, September 13th, 2023

I haven’t… talked about anything here in eons, lol. I figure I might stay with the running theme of TV stuff cause… why not, lol.

Honestly tho, it’s been so long I don’t remember much of what I used to put on here. I should probably change that.

But, anyhoo…

Tubi is awesome, seriously. They have a lot of good and interesting stuff and not a lot of ads, or at least, not a lot on the stuff I’ve been watching. It’s great.

I like the name, too. “Tubi”… I think it’s a Shakespeare reference. “Tubi, or not Tubi”. Kinda brilliant. Also doubles I think as a reference to those old style CRT televisions… and their gigantic, uhm, tubes. Yeah.

*Ahem*.

Well, yeah. Tubi is… good.

Wow, I can practically feel the gears grinding, here, lol. I really should blog more.

Well, I’ve been using Tubi to watch a lot of my girlfriends’ stuff, I guess to fill in the blanks on what they are doing, and, if I’m being honest, on what I’ve done myself, in my own life. I’ve lived quite a long time, and I guess that I’ve forgotten much in the past four decades.

Let’s start with last night. Last night, I saw Alice Upside Down, which is a kid’s movie starring a young Alyson Stoner. As with all of these types of movies, I liked it more than I think I was supposed to, lol. Yeah. And as is very usual with… all of this stuff, it’s all kinda… eerily… close to me and, uhm, yeah, IDK, hard to unpack. Well, ok, here goes.

I’ve always liked Alyson Stoner. I mean, I’m a fan, and I can say that unabashedly. I genuinely like her music, for example. I mean I actually have some mp3’s from her, I mean. And I knew who she was before the Super Bowl performance with Missy Elliot.

So, this was a treat, and of the kind that would have gone unnoticed by me in ages past, in the dark days before the era of streaming, so I decided to indulge. The movie itself was… good, objectively, for what it is; I mean, it’s a kid’s movie from 2007, so it’s very… “Hilary Duff- esque”, with a lot of Disney channel-ness and fantastical interludes. But it’s not entirely young- the aim here is of a year or two older than that of the average Disney channel obsessive, so the protagonist (the titular Alice, played by Alyson) dresses sometimes in a style that I might call “watered down Hot Topic”. 2007 to the core, then.

Alyson has a lot of charisma. She’s a very good actor, and had a lot of talent even at a young age, for sure. Her dad is played by Luke Perry, who also does well. (Requisite creepy aside, here – Alice’s dad is my age (!) give or take a year, and this is vaguely significant (!). This may not seem creepy now, but you wait, oh, you just just wait). Alyson’s rival is played by Bridgit Mendler, who acquits herself nicely in her bad girl role, interestingly. Her brother is played by Lucas Greebel who starred in the High School Musical movies and the Switched at Birth TV series with Vanessa Marano.

And… ahhhhh, yeah, ok, I juuuuust figured something out right now. Zoey Deutch, right? So THAT’S what she was doing… yup! Yup. I get it. Yup. Mmmmmn hmmmn. I mean, of course, I can’t believe I didn’t see it sooner! I just… wait. You know, never mind, that’s another essay, … or two. Yeah. Wow.

Umn, well, back to the review… uh, good movie-ish, thing… Oh fuck it, a formal review isn’t what we’re here for anyways, is it?

Ok, I need to organize my thoughts, such as they are, a bit.

The whole flick had a massively strong undercurrent of trying to advertise Bridgit Mendler as a girlfriend to yours truly, which… they didn’t need to do, lol, but I got a kick out of their over-the-top efforts, one amazingly funny (to me, nobody else) scene came when Alice tried to set up her my-age dad with her Bridgit Mendler lookalike teacher (remember- Bridgit is in school right now). Throughout the scene, an album from the band “Berlin” is placed within frame behind Alice. The name “Mendler” is of course German for “coat maker”, which, interestingly, ties in quite nicely with her single Hurricane.

Get it? Coat Maker- Hurricane? It’s a joke, kinda. But… yeah. The whole movie, and I mean, the whole fucking movie, was laced top to bottom with subtle asides that scream “HEY TOM, LOOK AT THIS CHICK! FUCK HER!”

Another obtuse scene had Bridgit’s character perform an audition for a school play replete with references to yours truly and- beside her, I kid you not- was a sign saying in bold letters “PRETTY LADY”, lol… and… other stuff, there’s too much to name, here. Too many things to list. The age thing here is also relevant- a line is said in the movie about Alice pushing pushing her dad to date Bridgit Mendler teacher stand-in, regardless of the 15 year age gap between the two of them. Mendler is of course about 15 years younger than I am.

Again, I had thought that I was the one who had pursued these girls. I suppose I was wrong.

Another very shocking (to me) scene came two thirds of the movie in when a Taylor Swift lookalike (!!!!!!!) entered the picture looking, sounding and acting like a carbon copy of teenage TayTay, and was introduced specifically as a potential/inevitable wife (!!!!!!!!!). I swear to fucking God I did a double take at that one.

This movie was released in 2007. That means it was in production during what… 2006? 2005? Taylor’s debut album came out in 2006! Christ! This scene is really obvious in it’s implications; there is no mistaking what it is saying. Again I’m just baffled; obviously I did not understand who it was that was initiating these relationships.

In the cases of both Taylor and Bridgit I thought I was being so devious and sneaky and… IDK, Machiavellian, by swooping in when they were so young and impressionable, from my perspective. But man… nope, lol. They both had me pegged and figured out lonnnnng before I had ever heard or laid eyes on either one of them. It’s kinda humbling, actually.

But, whatever. Regardless, the movie contains a ton of references to my own school career, including my time spent in high school working on the school creative magazine, Creations, which was no small part of my life, and a part I’ve not really discussed, here. Creations wasn’t just some random high school production- it was deemed more than once to be the best high school literary/creative magazine in the country, and it won a truckload of awards during my tenure with it. It’s pretty interesting stuff, actually. Maybe I’ll talk about it more, here, maybe not. But it was because of my time with Creations that I became such a stickler for, IDK, good creative writing.

Sometimes I do kinda wish that I could go back and talk with the teachers that created those masterpiece compendiums with us. I can’t, but… it would be nice. Hmmmn. Things to think about, I guess.

I still have the books. I’ll always keep them. Honestly, they’re really really good.

Wow, sooooo much to unpack, here. Jeebus.

IDK. I’ve been watching other movies, too.

I’ve seen a bunch of Kelli Berglund movies as well. She is also awesome, and they are also interesting, in a different way. She seems to have been heavily influenced by my past and present with Karate and TaeKwonDo, interestingly. I’m not entirely sure how this works, but… there it is.

She made a couple of… unrelated movies in Australia about two different Americans who excelled in two different sports, and who were both missing a parent, and who both wound up teaching a bunch of down-on-their-luck Aussies how to work together and be a better team and beat some “evil” athletes, and… hmmn. Peyton Roi List also made one of these.

I was kinda… confused by that. And made curious. That seems like kind of a specific genre, doesn’t it? Like… ex-Disney stars IRL who play as American athletes missing a parent who have obstacles in the states who move to Aussieland and coach Australians who need a fresh outlook to beat some evil rival athletes… kinda weirdly specific, lol.

I think I found the answer in the last couple of frames of Swimming For Gold, Peyton List’s movie. These movies are being subsidized by the Aussie government. They’re probably then being made by the same people. In Kelli’s case I noticed that even though ostensibly her characters were “different”, they somehow shared specific details in their pasts and, amusingly, wardrobe pieces.

But ok, in Kelli’s movies she teaches gymnastics in one movie and cheerleading in the other, but really, she’s teaching a mix of both and also Karate and TKD in both movies. It’s kinda… cool, but I mean, she’s channeling me so hard in these flicks, lol.

So in watching Kelli’s movies, Raising the Bar and Going for Gold (note: not Swimming for Gold, that’s Peyton’s movie, we’re talking about Going for Gold, here) I can see what I used to do and teach with others in what she does and it’s pretty cool. It’s… kinda awesome. It brings back a lot of memories.

IDK, a lot to think about. These movies are actually packed with stuff, things mostly directed at a very specific athletic audience.

Yeah. One interesting theme I’ve noticed buried deep in these flicks in general is the whole idea that you can’t really “leave” athletics, not after spending your youth doing them. And that’s something I’m going through right now, as a middle aged man.

IDK, you just… can’t. You can’t leave, can you? This is a big essay, but… yeah it’s the truth. I’ve been watching a lot of these young gymnastics- cheerleader movies lately- not just the few I’ve listed above, and a bunch of them make a point to say that it’s really tough to check out of gymnastics or cheer or dance after a decade and a half of them. I get what they’re saying, there.

In my case it was the martial arts but the principal was the same. You spend so many years of your formative time doing something and it’s difficult if not impossible to leave, at least entirely.

Well, I’m not complaining, mind you. It’s not a bad thing to have gymnastics or Karate or Wrestling or whatever as a part of who you are. But it does become something to manage, then.

Well… this essay is becoming a few, all kinda mushed together haphazardly. I should probably stop here before it gets even more unwieldly.

Ok, I think I need to blog more, really. Like, seriously, lol.

Ok then.