Sighinide

Last night’s figure skating was cool, wasn’t it? Sotnikova- WOW- what a performance! I think she deserved the gold. Yuna Kim was transcendent as usual, which raises the question- if someone is *always* transcendent, is she actually so? Maybe she’s normal, and everyone else is just unevolved.

Gracie Gold is the local girl who could. She was fourth in the standings, but first in my heart. *GUSH*.

Her wikipedia page says that she wants to become an orthodontist. Hopefully she’ll come back to Illinois one day and start up a practice. I’ll need to remember to “lose” my retainer if she does, but that won’t be a problem.

After the drama last night, I found myself wondering what my old role model, Irina Slutskaya, was doing. It turns out that she’s working in the Olympic village! How cool is that? I hope this means that she beat her vasculitis as I did. She was my idol back in the days when I was suffering from a rare version of Lupus called Churg-Strauss vasculitis (which is also the kind she had, if I am remembering her symptoms correctly). Good for you, Irina!!!!!!!! I love you!

Geez, I need to tone it down a little. Ok, whatever.

I like figure skating because of the cute girls and athleticism, yes, but I also enjoy it because of the music. Figure skating is almost unique because of the fantastic way in which it blends pop culture and classic orchestral music. It stands as an impressive contrast to the rest of of pop culture, which tends to cheapen great classical music by using it in the most shallow ways possible.

I’m thinking mostly of the hundreds of commercials that have used snippets of classical and baroque masterpieces simply to create childish punchlines. It’s sick, and it lessens appreciation for great music.

Olympic level figure skating actually complements the masterpieces. I like that a lot.

Cool beans.

What’s a Mochi? I don’t know.

And, frankly, I don’t care.

Why? I don’t care because I just saw the ladies short program, that’s why. Oh, the drama! The excitement! The cute girls! The skating!

I had a fun evening, with a few caveats. It’s such a shame that Mao Asada didn’t perform to the best of her abilities. I’ll never forget her long program at Vancouver. It was dark, imposing, and oh-so perfect. It was a slice of heaven on ice. You could have fixed a car with her triple axels.

Yulia’s unfortunate fall did have the nice side effect of boosting Sotnikova’s stature, so I guess that moment wasn’t all bad. Yulia just needs a few more years. I’ll look forward to seeing her in 2018.

Yuna Kim was, as expected, awesome. What a talent! What a beauty! I love her!! I’ll never forget her Vancouver performances either, though I confess that I did forget her name. I should have taken Gracie Gold’s cue from her instagram picture and googled her. It didn’t help matters that I honestly expected Yuna to not even show up at these Olympics. She was so supremely transcendant at Vancouver that it almost seemed like she wouldn’t need to bother any more with the affairs of us mortals. At the time, I was so, so impressed with her that I considered a relationship with her, only to back down because her perfectness scared me. How can you make someone like her better? You can’t. All you can do is bring her down… so I stayed away.

Kostner ruled. So glad to see that she got it together. I admit that I didn’t see her potential in her previous Olympic performances. Pleased to see that I was wrong.

Gracie. Was. Awesome. I little nervous? Who cares. For her first Olympics, she rocked it and then some. Her outfit was pretty but not as pretty as the blue one, which I hope she wears again for her long program.

Ashley was spunky and cool. She had so much energy and personality! She also seemed to have more power than the select few girls that NBC showed me tonight. She can jump on a dime and land on a half-penny (Nyuck, nyuck!).

Polina Edmunds is cool.

I wish I could gush more but I need to see Swifty and then go to bed.

I won’t talk to anyone before the long performances are done. These wonderful people have enough to think about! Plus, I need time to think of a few decent skating-related pick up lines (Are your legs tired? Because you’ve been… nah).

Must… go… to… bed… brain… shutting… down…

But FIRST-

I visited Salon.com at work today, as I tend to do about once a month. It’s a force of habit, I guess, and I need to do something to unwind sometimes. As usual, I was disappointed. It’s mostly a rag now. The Salon of today is a parody of itself as it was during it’s nineties glory years. Hell, the Salon of today almost makes one pine for the unspeakable “Video Dog” era.

I did get something out my brief visit, though- a good, hearty laugh. I saw one of the unintentionally funniest things I’ve ever seen in my life.

There, on the front page, was a headline: “Michael Dunn and Open Season on Black Teenagers: The Onslaught of White Murder”.

God, I could barely contain myself! I nearly fell out of my chair trying to restrain my muffled chuckling.

I didn’t read the article. There was no need, of course. But I’m grateful that I saw the headline when I could.

After I recovered, I reflected. Is Salon just trolling everybody these days? I mean… they can’t be serious, right?

I don’t know for sure, but I do know that the pure, undistilled crazy of a modern Salon or Huffington Post can really enliven a boring work day.

Thanks for the laughs, guys!

Wow, I just saw 13 straight hours of Olympics coverage. Ummmm ow.

My eyes are drying up and my noggin is rattling and my ears are throbbing, but it was worth it.

What a tumult of athleticized theatrics! I loved it! This was a day well spent.

This was also a day where a few birthdays were celebrated in the family. Good, fine stuff happened, and not a day too soon, as I was becoming too pessimistic.

Hmmmmmmmmm, what did I like?

I liked the ice dancing. Davis and White are divine on the ice.

Rave.

I liked Bode’s redemption on the slopes. He deserved it.

Save.

I liked seeing Jason Brown and his ponytail steal a moment for a selfie in the stands during ice dancing.

Knave.

I liked the pizza we had tonight, but it was so greasy I swear I could actually feel my arteries clogging up as I ate it.

Grave.

Tessa Virtue is hotsauce.

Fave.

I LOVED the outfit of that one ice dancer that was very blue except for a stream of pretty jewels down her front.

Crave.

Speaking of things I like, Gracie Gold is going to be impressing everyone soon with her AMAZING everything. Mmmmm Gracie Gold.

I wish I was there so I could watch her be amazing in person. I’m so jelly I should open a Smucker’s factory.

Mmmmmmmm jelly. Wait… Smucker’s. Smucker’s… Smucker’s is Gracie Gold’s sponsor!!!!

AAAAHHHGGGGG it’s everywhere!!!!!

The trials and turbulence of our teenage years are not easy things to navigate. The wealth of so many hopes and problems can tie us up in a mess of emotions and destinies. The freedoms given to us by newfound adulthood can paralyze us. Mistakes happen.

Today… if I could choose to change one thing about my teen years- just one thing- it would be for me to have taken TaeKwonDo seriously. Looking back, I now realize that I could’ve been an Olympic athlete myself if I only would have seen myself as one.

I *wish* I would have seen myself as one. Dammit, I LOVE the Olympics! All the ingredients for me to have competed myself were there, but I just couldn’t put that last puzzle piece- my own self-image- into the right place.

I could have gone! Fuck.

By the time I was fourteen, I had 9 years of TaeKwonDo training. I was an expert. I was a natural athlete with a sharp mind and perfect technique. And then, when I was fifteen, a two time Olympic silver medalist, who was then widely regarded as the all-time best in his weight class, became my sensei. Under him, I became what I now realize was one of the best TaeKwonDo fighters in the country. And I know now that if I would have applied myself a bit more, I could have become one of the best in the world. Maybe the best in the world. I distinctly remember how impressed the judges were of me in my black belt test- and those were the same judges who officiated the Olympic Games.

It is awesome to realize now how good I was, but I didn’t know that when it counted. I never competed in Nationals, even when I could have won. I just couldn’t tear myself away from my small-town mindset long enough to travel somewhere and try something new. And, of course, I was afraid of losing. Too afraid to even try.

I should have tried. I wish I knew then what I know now: that your biggest regrets when you get older are not the times when came in second, or even fourth, but those times when you were too nervous to compete.

When I watch the Olympics now I love them, of course. But I watch them with a tinge of regret and envy. Perhaps this is why I so want to be a part of what’s happening on the Olympic stage right now. I am, I’m not ashamed to say, a bit jealous of Gracie Gold right now. That could have been me when I was her age.

Oh well. The choices we make determine who we are. If I would have taken home a gold medal, would I have tried to prove myself as a writer, or a programmer, or a wizard? Would I have been as hungry? I don’t know.

Maybe everything worked out for the best.

But… maybe not. Team USA looks like it’s having the time of its life right now. To see the whole experience, to take it all in, and to let it uplift you- it would change a person for the better.

I’ve always wanted a personal, public recognition of myself. An Olympic medal would have been the ultimate way to get it. It would have filled a hole in me that is still empty today.

… No. I shouldn’t dwell on the past. And I certainly shouldn’t begrudge the successes of others.

I hope I see Gracie or Ashley up on the podium again. They deserve it.